I’m not sure why the email was so triggering. Or why I haven’t simply unsubscribed from it before now.
But it led me down a rabbit hole of links that led to me needing to just sit down and cry. Not sobs, mind you. Just some old heart mess that I guess is still buried and needs to be addressed.
I dried my eyes, asked the Lord to reveal what the deal was, and went out for my morning walk. I came home realizing that the email had tapped into an old, unfilled longing. A familiar idol. A former avenue I tried turning to desperately for years to fill my heart. One that never satisfied.
What’s crazy is that I thought I had made a lot of progress in that area. I thought I had moved on. Obviously, there has been growth because what once would have left me undone for days, even weeks, took a short walk to shake out. But this morning reveals that while I have grown, there’s still room for more growth. And there’s still a need to guard my heart.
I type all of this out to share a phrase that is helping me:
“I’m not chasing that anymore.”
Because I’m not. The Lord and I have been working on this for years. He has shifted me and changed me and done so much good work in me. But that doesn’t mean I’ve reached a place of perfection. I still need to be on guard when it comes to this idol. I still need Him to help me look to Him and Him alone to fill my heart.
Maybe you need this phrase, too.
Maybe today is the day you need to draw a line in the sand when it comes to some of the things you have been chasing after over Him, more than Him, or instead of Him.
Maybe you need a phrase for when temptation shows up strong and leaves you wanting to fall back into old patterns you thought you had moved past.
Maybe you need to give yourself grace and start over again.
Maybe you need to declare something like this:
“I’m not who I was. Christ has declared me a new creation in Him, and He is shaping me to look more and more like Him each day. I know that’s who I used to be, but I’m not chasing __________ anymore.”
Keep moving in that new direction with Christ, friend, and know I’m over here cheering you on. ❤️
“Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you. Only let us hold true to what we have attained.” Philippians 3:12-16
Blessings, dear friends,